Happy Family Day, Jessica!

Twelve years ago yesterday, I awoke at 3 a.m. knowing that today was the day I would finally get to hold and hug my first daughter. The day my dream would come true. A small group of 6 families boarded a plane from Beijing to Chongqing. I could tell when we got off the plane, we were all wondering and thinking the same thing - we were only maybe an hour from meeting our daughters for the first time. We loaded our luggage on to one bus and all of us on to another bus. We were going straight to the Civil Affairs Office to get our babies.

We pulled up to the Civil Affairs Office. It was a small two story building and we could see the babies with the nannies right inside the door. This is the part where I only remember images. I know I walked in the door and snapped a quick picture. I looked at the babies and wasn't sure. I pointed to one and our guide said no, that's not Wen He. As soon as she said that, the nanny right next to me and the nanny behind her broke into big grins and held up tiniest little girl while nodding their heads. I think I pointed to her and then to me, they nodded their heads again and I remember they had the biggest grins on their faces.

They handed me this little girl, not even 15 lbs, dressed in a yellow sweatsuit with an orange hat and purple shoes. I picked up my Wen He, my Jessica Lin. She looked around - I could tell right away she was very curious. Then I gave her a hug. I totally lost it then. I realized I was holding my dream in my arms and she was real.

From there I only remember a couple of people taking pictures - I don't know when everyone else got their babies - and I remember looking out the door and seeing one other mom sitting on the curb with her daughter. Somewhere in this time, we took a family photo and then went upstairs to complete the paperwork, complete the adoption. By this time all of the babies were crying and hot and sweaty. It was over 80 degrees and very humid and as Itook off Jessie's clothes, I realized she had three layers of clothes on. I tried to feed her. I tried three different formulas, Jessie wouldn't eat any. Wouldn't even try. She just wanted to cry. She had obviously bonded with her foster mother and who was this strange person who kept hugging her and staring at her?

After that, we went to the notary's office, but had a few people take up the paperwork since it was six flights of stairs. I remember that Jessie loved the bus ride, especially when we went over a bump. I don't remember much after that. I know we went down to supper and neither of us was very hungry. My journal says Jessie went to sleep after a very emotional day.

Today, Jessica is a beautiful middle-schooler. My life has taken a lot of turns over the years and now being the mother of 3 beautiful girls from China. But April 17, 2000 is the day a dream came true and the day I finally knew I was on the path I was always meant to take.

Gotcha Day Anniversary

It's unbelievable that it was an entire year ago that we first got Amanda. I remember the grief and then the bargaining to go with anyone but us - in particular me. There's no doubt in my mind now that she was the child I'd waited all those years for. God's timing is alway perfect.

Things are never rosy or perfect. Overall, Amanda is very easy, very easy-going and adaptable. She's doing great at home. Academically doing outstanding at school. Lately she's been having some issues socially at school. She rather likes being in charge and doesn't always agree with the teacher's handling of issues. Being liked by everyone is very important to her and I don't think she's had a lot of experience around kids her own age. Not everyone likes everyone all the time. Something to learn.

She's still determined and knows what she wants, but her world of opportunities has widened from what it was before. Not much phases her. I guess she figures things have turned out okay so far. In some ways, she's younger than her age and others she's older. She loves being outside riding her bike or scooter. She's totally Americanized now - for good or bad. I do find it sad that she's totally forgotten her Mandarin. I guess being around people who speak it just once a week (during dance classes) isn't enough to retain it. At some point I'd like to have her take Chinese school but right now I'm afraid she'd think we're preparing her to go back to China. Yes, every now and then she'll verbalize something that I realize happened to her before and is afraid will happen again. Like she said "I'm really going to miss Jessica when she goes back to China to live with her mom and dad." I realized that that's probably what happened to her big sister that she lived with her in foster home in China - the one I have photos of, but she doesn't talk about in any reminicing of her life in China. Her big sister in China probably got adopted, so she's afraid that will happen to Jessica or Anna. So I've been showing Amanda lots of pictures of Jessica and Anna as babies, so she can see they've grown up together and are still with me. I've also been explaining adoption more. You just never know what your kids are thinking until they say something.

Anyway, we usually celebrate "Family Day" as adoption anniversary day which is tomorrow, but I've been thinking of that day a year ago and what a difference a year makes. So happy Gotcha Day to us!

Some Photos!

Jessica's volleyball team - the Gators. It's her 3rd year playing volleyball.
Anna is also playing volleyball, her 1st year. Her team is called the Wildcats.




My girls!




Family picture. Why is it we have at least 4 cameras and I can't find any of them?!
This was taken with my phone.



Can't believe we have green grass in Minnesota in March! Amanda still loves being outside.



Anna at the district band festival. Jessica was somewhere in the crowd behind her with her trumpet. This will be Anna's one and only year in band as she's decided to continue with her violin. This is the only year she can be in both band and orchestra, so is taking advantage of it.



Amanda's 6th birthday was March 10th. The night before, we had a Minnie Mouse themed party with lots of carnival games. It was probably the first birthday she celebrated, so I wanted to make sure it was a lot of fun. 9 active 5-6 year olds. It was fun!