Today Marks Month 48

But I'm not longer waiting for a referral, I'm waiting for Travel Approval (TA), and then I can set the time for travel. It will be in February since I can't go in December or January. It's still all so surreal to me. One day I can't wait to go get her and check sites to see the cost of airfare the end of December, and then other days I wonder how I'll ever pay for it all and if I'm doing the right thing for our family. It costs a lot more than it did 9 years ago, plus I feel I need to bring Jessica and Anna with me which adds a lot to the cost. They've waited as long as I have, and I just don't think they'd forgive me for not bringing them along. I promised after all that I'd take them and they've told all their friends. But that was before the ecomony tanked and I actually had a savings account. I trust and pray that it will all work out as it should. Somehow I'll figure it all out.

Freaking Out Right Now

You'd think after waiting nearly 4 years from LID (I hit that landmark next Monday), that I'd be a little more prepared to move to the travel planning stage. Well, I'm not and I'm freaking out a little, okay, make that a lot here!

I had 3 major life events happen within a span of 4 days from October 16-October 20. I moved, my mom passed away (very unexpectedly), and I got my referral. I've finally finished moving, but still have to unpack. My mom's stuff is taken care of for the most part, but I'm still in shock. And now I'm getting travel prep stuff from my agency.

I still have to finish 3 more Hague training credits (I've kept my I-600a up-to-date, but the agency asks for it anyway). I'm sending my passport renewal application off today. I still need to work on my girls' who's also expired. My fingerprints will expire before I travel in February. I need to update my homestudy for my new address. I'm just not ready.

I know I freaked out a little with my other girl's trips, but I was at least emotionally ready for this. I still have to deal with Thanksgiving, my birthday, December 2nd, Christmas, New Year's, Chinese New Year, my girls dance production that will take up all of my January weekends.

Where's the money going to come from and how soon will I need it?! The longer I keep it in my 401k plan, the more I'll have available. Yikes!!

Okay, I feel better just venting. And one of my coworkers who's privy to my life came over and let me vent as well, so I feel better.

Introducing Amanda Li Kasper

Here she is! Qian Yu Xi is 4 1/2 years old and in foster care in Shanghai. Birthday is March 10, 2006. I probably won't travel until February to get her. I still can't believe she's finally real!!

Stay Tuned...

Keep your fingers crossed or say a little prayer that things work out the way they are supposed to.

Woohoo on Referrals!

My agency got 2 groups of LID's in this referral batch. Only 3 days included in the batch, but I consider it progress.

46 Months

I really can't believe I'm approaching the 4 year mark and there's still no end in sight. I think to stay on the NSN track, I'm going to be looking at a 6 year wait at this point. I can't even imagine the wait for those behind me in line. Maybe my agency will bring back good news from China.

Then again, maybe not. I've got other things going on right now, so it's not the best time. But if the right child comes around, I'm not going to say no.

Sorry I haven't posted

Wow, I didn't realize I haven't posted since July! I totally missed month 45 of waiting. Lots going on including school starting.

8 Years Ago

8 years ago in Wuhan, Hubei, China, I adopted Anna. I can't believe it's been 8 years already. She just turned 9 and is already growing into a young lady. Very independent, very capable, and very girly. I always say that Jessica made me a mom, and Anna made us a family. Happy Family Day to us!

44 Months

43 Months and STILL Waiting

with no end in sight! It's hard to still be waiting. I look at the Waiting Children and hope and pray. I hope each month that CCAA will include more days than everyone thought they would, but they don't. Sometimes I wonder why I still wait. I know the answer: because I still believe it will happen. Because my girls still want a sister. Hopefully someday before we quit caring...